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April 15, 2009

Organic is NOT overrated... A letter

I found an old email from you today. I sent you a draft of something new I was working on and you were so excited to get a first peek at my work. I remember that. When we used to be excited about what was going on in each others lives. When we knew about what was going on in each others lives. Our time apart was necessary and good, I needed to breathe and learn that it was indeed possible for me to live without you. I knew that, deep down somewhere I knew that it was true, but now that I have had this time away from you, I know that it is possible.

Somehow, we found our way back to each other, the way we always do, but something seems off this time. I feel like I aged ten years in the time we spent apart and now everything just feels awkward, like we are forcing things back into the way they were and it doesn’t feel right. A part of me misses you, the laughs, the jokes, the late night phone calls where we would talk about absolutely everything and nothing. I miss being needed by you, being depended on; being able to give advice and know that it was appreciated…when it was listened to. But the part of me that I love the most, the part of me that tries so hard to be the voice of reason, reminds me of all the reasons I shouldn’t and can’t spend too much time thinking about those old days.  I think maybe, the hurt killed off a piece of me that made me cling to you. Now I feel like I am forcing a new space for you in my world because my heart says you should still be there, you should have a place in it, but the simplicity of you and I, seems to have melted away behind everything we have been through.  

I have gotten to the point where I feel independent from you. I can listen to songs we used to put on repeat and not hear you singing off key in the background. I can go places where we used to spend lazy afternoons and take in the sunshine on my own, and I have to admit, I have fallen in love with that feeling. Like somehow the power you had to possess my mind has been broken and I’m free to think my own thoughts.

I have to admit, I feel silly even saying this, and a little afraid that you won’t understand, but then again, this is how I feel. If you don’t understand then that is all the more reason for me to feel the way I do. The disconnect between us providing, all the more reason to listen to my heart and just be. This is not to say that I don’t love you anymore. I do, I always will, but this time it’s with a different kind of love. It’s with a love that allows me to love myself more, above and beyond and that is the difference.

I’m going to delete that email, before my thoughts become cloudy and sadness begins to creep in forcing me to forget and bend myself back into painful shapes that gave you easy passage to take over my life. That person is dead and gone and the phoenix has arrived, because she needed to. The past is what it is, it was amazing and I’m grateful for what we shared. What the future holds, who knows, but I can say that I won’t look back and have any regrets. You taught me the importance of loving myself, of looking out for myself, of making myself a priority and for that I thank you.

April 08, 2009

5am thoughts

The time is 5 am. Why I am up at 5 am, sitting on my couch in complete darkness typing this blog is beyond me. It must be because I am on vacation and I know I can go back to sleep and not have to be up in two hours for work. I definitely am a gigantic fan of spring break. I woke up about 45 minutes ago and lay in my bed thinking about my interview. Last night I was at rehearsal for the praise and worship team and my pastor came in and we talked for a minute about the interview. He told me that I was going to do an excellent job and as soon as he said that I felt good. I have been low key stressing about this interview. It’s a really surreal feeling thinking about doing a television interview. Who am I that I am going to sitting down in front of a camera discussing this book on a major television network? This is crazy! I am really excited though. God is moving with this book and everything is happening so fast. Not so fast that I can’t enjoy it, but fast enough for me and my ADD self to stay focused. LOL!

I have been going through a lot of personal transitions in my life, some good, some bad, some hurtful, but every last one of them, designed to force me to grow in some way. I have a baby idea for another book. I want to incorporate all of the emotions and tears I felt in just the last few months and create a dialogue on how to be a human. It’s okay to feel what we feel, to think how we think, to want what we want. We don’t have to let people run over us, or discount how we feel. We don’t have to be afraid to shine because we don’t know how people will react, who cares? I have learned to surround myself with people who are just as productive and focused and accomplished as I am. The whole birds of a feather theory. People who are grinding just as hard as I am don’t have time to sit back and worry about what I’m doing. They celebrate, participate, and then get back to what they were doing. That’s what it’s about. But for a long time, I would swallow back how I felt about something and force myself to go with the flow. But now, as my milestone birthday approaches, I feel that light bulb flickering and I see now that I don’t have to hide how I feel. I can express it and do what I need to do. That is a beautiful thing. So, I’m still playing with the idea for now, developing characters and all that good stuff, but for now I am enjoying promoting U.G.L.Y. and I am very excited about this interview! Pray for me!!

 

Peace Y’all,

B


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